Author: Elle Wagner

Navigating Pet Friendly New Orleans with @martinithedragdog : An Incomplete Overview

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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Well, we did it! We ate, drank, and explored the best of NOLA with our little diva and relative ease.

To be honest, I’m shocked – Martini’s personality is unpredictable at best and he doesn’t exactly love strangers. This was definitely a social experiment and parenting test and I’m happy to report, we passed with flying colors! But you know, kind of in that fluke way that you ace a test in middle school – with zero studying and the magic of your subconscious that retained info while you were half napping in class.

Here’s what we got up to:

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We’re ‘Ditching’ Our Family for Thanksgiving : A Tale of 2 Brave Souls & A Pomeranian

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

ACS_0322Well, you heard it here first – these rebels aren’t heading up North to spend Thanksgiving with the family. (Too cold, too close to when we have to go back for Christmas.) SO – New Orleans getaway it is!

Here’s how we plan to spend our time in everyone’s favorite adult playground with our five pound bundle of joy:

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Real Life : I’m Learning My M-I-L’s Decorating Tips & Using Them For Spooky Good, IE: Our Halloween Decor Tour

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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Ok, y’all – the silent rumors are true. I have become a bit of a.. decorator? The walls are no longer blank. Pinot Grigio is being drunk. SOMETIMES with ice. I’m one closet full of Vera Bradley away from turning into my mother in law. (Which, tbh – I’d be lucky! She’s great. But still – cue panic attack from the last shreds of my youth, you know?)

I can’t lie, though – evenings at our house are insanely cozy and bring me so much joy now. I don’t think I’ve necessarily gone overboard, but celebrating the changing of seasons (especially Halloween! Who doesn’t love a bit of frivolous debauchery? If the answer is anything less than an enthusiastic yes, kindly see yourself out of this blog) lightens my inevitable SAD and makes life feel more grounded and happy.

SO, I’m going to tell you how I did it in a foolproof way that didn’t turn our house into something juvenile, messy, or worse – a clashing mess.

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I Went to SpiceWorld and I Never Wanted to Leave

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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Seeing as I’m only now waking up from a pretty long internet hiatus, I haven’t had the chance to share with most of you something pretty earth shattering that happened this summer :

I saw the Spice Girls. In London. Up close and PERSONAL.

Ever since I saw the movie when I was six – faux double decker bus of dreams flying across Tower Bridge, it’s been a dream of mine to see my personal heroes in the big smoke. Truly, I thought it would never happen. And then they got social media. And then there was talk of a tour.. perhaps. And then all hell broke loose once they released the dates and I booked flights and accommodation the second I secured tickets.

21 years later, it happened! And it was EVERY bit as magical, girl power filled, and rhinestone adorned as I could have ever dreamed it would be.

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STOP BUYING UGLY DOG TOYS : An Aesthetic Guide to Puppy Play Time

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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Okay y’all : a news update. Jon and I adopted this sweet, unbelievably gorgeous little monster at the end of May. His name is Martini (@martinithedragdog, rather) – and he’s fucking teething like crazy and has caused us to bleed on multiple occasions.

Cue: dog toys.

If you’re the kind of person who doesn’t mind ripped up, slobbered over, dirty tennis balls all over the place – this post (and blog, probably) isn’t for you. Move on. But if you get it – first of all, I love you. Secondly, Buckle. UP!
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My Instagram Theme Is a Massive Creative Buzzkill and It’s Not Cute™️

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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Full disclosure : I’ve fully become a prisoner to my very pink, Barbie fantasy Instagram theme. It breaks my heart to admit it, because it soothes my Virgo soul to see all of the gorgeous flamingo pink accents work in harmony throughout the grid. However, the grim reality is I’ve fully stopped even attempting to post because the opportunities to flood a photo with that much pink can be few and far between in daily life (no matter how much pink lipstick and sunglasses you wear..).

So, now it’s decision time : let my account go completely stagnant, or find other ways to find happiness on the platform.
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Rebecca Minkoff really DID THAT with the Edie Shoulder Bag : A review

~ Elle Wagner ~ 1 Comment

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Guys, I know the blog’s been a bit heavy with all of my life happenings lately. It’s a true reflection of what’s been going on, however it feels like a new season is very much in full swing (literally and figuratively) – and I want to embrace that light and joy wholeheartedly!

Is that a long way of saying “sorry the last post was about cancer, here’s a handbag review”? Kind of. But as an OG fan of Rebecca Minkoff, I couldn’t be more thrilled to share the new addition to my collection with you – meet Edie.

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FYI : Cancer is a life sucking drama queen and I’m officially cancelling them.

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment
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Histologic image of oral squamous cell carcinoma. At least it’s pink.

So, you might have noticed I’ve been gone! (Probably not, but don’t hurt my feelings and affirm that, will you?)

I can’t remember how much or how little I’ve told you about what’s going on with my mom. Essentially, last summer she found a sore on her tongue – and it ended up being cancerous. She had a surgery, they thought it was gone. Then it popped up again on her jaw, because cancer is the worst. But, thankfully, they went in and got rid of that too! After that, we weren’t exactly sold on the quality of care she was getting in Boston – so she and dad packed their bags (puppies and all) and headed to Houston, TX for her to receive radiation at MD Anderson.

I’m so grateful she’s getting the best care. But I also feel the need to extend the biggest and best “fuck off forever, please” to the big old C word on this very blog that hasn’t gotten much love from me because I’ve been an emotional, tired wreck for the better part of a year.

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DIY Self Care Ideas : AKA, How I Preserve My Sanity When Everything’s Going to Shit

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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We’ve all been there, people. Some days, whether you like it or not – it’s 4AM, you’re up with a head full of doubts/to-do lists/general fears, and the likelihood of getting back to sleep are zero to none. That, annoyingly enough, was me this morning.

Honestly, I’d let you know what triggered it – but it might just be down to the fact that I have my period and had an absolutely fantastic tequila martini last night. Who knows. But, since the early wake up call and desire to do absolutely nothing but watch Hulu all day are out of my control – I’ll share my best tips on how to eradicate those grumps ASAP.

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To Jesus, Thanks for Everything! : How Jinkx Monsoon & BenDeLaCreme made a drag holiday show that broke the mold with a glitter bomb

~ Elle Wagner ~ Leave a comment

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The most wonderful time of the year might be just behind us, but I have to say – Atlanta truly blessed me with a cornucopia of quality themed drag events to attend this season. A few weeks ago we managed to make it out to three different drag shows around town – and while all fabulous – I HAD to take a moment to gush about Jinkx Monsoon & BenDeLaCreme’s first collaboration, “To Jesus, Thanks for Everything!”, because WOW. I just mean.. WOW. Wow! YAS. You get the idea, people.

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